Tuesday, October 21, 2008

'NCIS' Star Pauley Perrette Comes Out Against Proposition 8

My neighbor and good friend, Pauley Perrette (Abbey on TV's NCIS) has written a wonderful essay on why Proposition 8 is bad for California -- and for the world in general. I knew there was a reason why I loved her so much, besides the fact that she's a pretty cool chick.

Check it out below!


By Pauley Perrette

I realize that this could be entitled “Proposition Fear” but it doesn’t rhyme and it doesn’t exemplify the true nature of the issue, either in initial intent or the inevitable outcome. Proposition 8 is an initiative on the ballot set for November 4th, 2008 that would change the California Constitution to eliminate the right of same sex couples to marry. There is nothing else to it. It is simply to “eliminate rights”.

There have been many times in the history of this country where necessary reform has been both championed and enacted. Reforming our laws can be a positive process, one which makes this country better and more true to what we stand for, such as “All men are created equal”, and “Liberty and justice for all”. In the beginning, “All men are created equal”, actually meant “All white male property owners” are created equal. Later reform meant this clause was inclusive of all white males. After a while, and an enormous amount of bloodshed, women and people of color would also be afforded most of the same rights.

Marriage has taken even longer to reform. Anti-miscegenation laws prevented couples of different races from marrying. It was a felonious crime, in which offenders could be imprisoned, and were. This may sound like ancient history, but it certainly is not. The case of Loving Vs. Virginia, which finally rid us of this unfair treatment of some of our “equals”, was only finally litigated and won 1967. California should be proud that they were, as usual, ahead of the curve: California ended anti-miscegenation laws in 1948.

There are many cultures that do not allow anyone to marry the person of their choosing at all. The person you marry is chosen for you. This practice is still in effect within certain religions. In this country, one has the right to choose their religion, thus, engaging in the tradition of your marriage partner being chosen for you, or picking your own mate, is voluntary. This should not be ruled involuntary by the state.

Religious persons are the overwhelming proponents of Proposition 8, although many do not support Proposition 8. In point of fact, two denominations, plus some religious advocates from outside of California, are taking the lead in supporting Proposition 8. In their zeal, they have made many false claims in their attempt to frighten voters into voting for Proposition 8, such as churches losing their IRS status and that same sex marriage being forced upon children in school. These allegations have been clearly stated as untruths, yet the campaign of false rhetoric continues in millions of dollars worth of false advertising..

Here’s the real truth: whether or not Proposition 8 passes, churches are allowed to discriminate against whomever they want, or to not discriminate. Some churches will not ordain women or allow them as members of the clergy. Some do. Some churches allow marriage ceremonies for anyone who wants to make that kind of commitment, some do not. Some do not allow divorce, or a divorcee to remarry. Churches are segregated, delegated and regulated by their own clergy and judicatory heads. Each of us has the choice to attend the church we want to, or none at all. Separation of church and state allows for religions to have their own set of rules as to whom they will accept and who they won’t, and the practices they support and the ones they don’t. They will continue to be able to do so. Equal rights for everyone under the law allows churches to proudly define themselves as what they do or do not support. The bottom line? Proposition 8 will not affect religious communities at all.

As far as the continuous lies about schools go, California Law prohibits any child from being taught anything about health or family issues against their parents will. Not only does Proposition 8 mention nothing about education, the Superior Court has already ruled these scare tactic claims in their current ads as false and misleading. They continue making these claims regardless of the exposition of the truth to try to instill false fear.

And what is the fear? “Protecting Marriage”, and many other varied wordings of the same sentiment, seems to be the mantra at the core of this. This is very similar to the language used in the anti-miscegenation laws of yore. “Protecting,” suggests that something is in danger, could be stolen or damaged. When others are doing the same thing you are, when they believe in the same values you do: commitment and loyalty and monogamy - doesn’t that lend support for the values of marriage? Is a gay married person going to sneak into your house in the middle of the night and steal your marriage? Your marriage may be threatened by infidelity, lack of interest, lack of commitment or tragically by abuse or deception, however, other committed married couples do not affect your marriage at all.

Many people are vehemently in objection to legal marriage all together, for anyone whatsoever, to the point where they would like to have it legally impossible for anyone to be married. Same sex couples that believe in marriage believe the same thing straight marriage oriented people do if faced with an anti-marriage for all proposal. They believe in the right to make that commitment if they want to.

Personally, I am a church-going Christian. I love my church, my congregation; it’s my favorite place to be. I feel the safest and the happiest when I am at my beloved church.
I am a straight, female, divorced Christian who has chosen an excellent mate (this time)
and am about to get married, in my church. I love my fiancé more than I thought a person could love another and thank God every day for him. Exactly the way many couples of differing races, religions and orientations feel about their beloveds. In many places and times, I would not be able to get married. Because I chose my own partner, because I was divorced years ago, because I am of Native American heritage (now mixed with several other things) or if marriage was outlawed all together, I wouldn’t be able to be married. But I can. And I am.

I have been making arrangements, calling my family, speaking with my pastor, trying to figure out what to wear; trying to make a list of invitations, the same thing many other couples have been doing. I’ve been to, and and have been in, many beautiful weddings of late. Some are same sex, some are opposite sex. They made plans for their day as I am doing now. Food, location, family, friends, flowers, reservations, flights… I’ve worn a dress, taken endless pictures and cried tears of joy for all of my friend’s nuptials in the exact same way.

The only difference is, there are people who want to amend the California Constitution in order to strip some of my friends of their marriages. Forget about the food, the location, the family, the friends, the flowers and the wonderful memories of that special day… It was their commitment and love that made me cry.

These are People.
People with pretty conservative ideals.
People who love each other so much they want to make it official and legal, have a wedding and celebrate with their loved ones. They have happy photo albums and saved their cake. They have rings and special things from their weddings. They love each other, just like straight people do.

Love is a big word. I believe in Love. I believe that God is Love. I believe in things like
1 John Chapter 4: 7-12 /20-21.

People who love each other.
Really? That is who you want to spend millions of dollars to “eliminate the rights” of?
I don’t know what church you go to, but I’m sure glad I go to mine. A church that believes in love and equality for all.

And I’m sure glad that I will not have on my conscience and in my soul that I supported a bill of hate and fear and a campaign of lies.

I am proudly voting No on Proposition 8. And am proud to be able to say years from now, when there are plenty more married couples of all types and shapes and colors and sizes trying to do the right thing with their marriage,
that I did the right thing.

I am an American who does what we say we are…
Liberty and Justice for all…
All are created equal.

And I am a Christian
Who does what it says…
Love one another…
The greatest of these is Love.

No On Prop 8.

Pauley Perrette


At 5:38 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

in my heart, i want so very much to agree. yet there are commandments in the bible... but above all there is the first, given by our Lord, to LOVE, ABOVE ALL ELSE.

practically, i will say this: why spend so much of the Church's (big c AND little c) energy, effort, and resources on what are personal choices instead of ministering to one another one-on-one, as commanded?

POWER. just as Ms. P. suggested. and this seems to be the bigger sin,. if i were the one to judge, but humbly, only He can.

in the meantime, there are many who aren't reached in the everyday with needs and pain while we argue about our neighbor's way of life? funny, only a human being can make war over love.

in all, well written piece, and i honor you for standing up for what you believe in, especially with such passion, respect and eloquence, even if i don't fully agree.

so as you walk down the aisle, many blessings to you and yours, with love in your heart for all those who cannot.

At 1:15 PM, Blogger Ken Knox said...

Thank you for your post. I think you really "get" what Christianity is about. It's not about judgment, even if you don't agree with someone else's way of life. Also, it's very important to remember that the Bible was written in a time LONG ago, by MEN who had their own agendas to fulfill. As such, it is subject to their personal ideologies. I think very little of what is written in the Bible could actually be attributed to "God."

At 6:35 PM, Blogger aldee said...

To Ken Knox read the bible and you will see that what it says in 2 Timothy 3:16-17, "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, 17so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work."

At 12:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

To Anonymous:

The first Commandment is not "love, above all else", in fact that isn't a Commandment at all.

At 1:49 PM, OpenID babypuppy1979 said...

I recently proposed to my girlfriend. she said yes. I love her more than I ever thought I would love anyone. It irks me to no end that she and I can't be "legally married" just because we are gay. It also irks me that wife beaters, child molesters and rapists have more legal rights thans i do, as long as they're straight. Thanks for supporting this issue, Ms. Perrette.

LINA over and OUT

At 4:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love. Good point, but if we are going for the biblical love, read 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. Love isnt lust. Love is more of, say a parent dying to save a child that may not even be grateful in 30 years. Selflessness, honesty trust hope...love.Biblically, i dont agree with the homosexual lifestyle, but i dont want them dead, nor does God. I do love them, and they are people. I do not care about htere choices as long as they dont get mad at me for not liking there lifestyle. Im not going to shove it down there throats, as long as they dont shove it down mine. Constitionally there is no reason for them NOT to marry,a nd we really cant use the BIble because...well, even though we should, we cant. But still, I appreciate her faith. She is preaching acceptance. Cool, but remember that it is wrong Biblically. Like a women or man having an affair. Its bad. You still love and accept them. But dont let them tell you its alright and thhey didnt do anything wrong. Because of love (would you jump in front of a bus to save someone that wouldnt care? It depends how selfless you are:D)

At 4:26 AM, Blogger abogada said...

When two people make a decision to share their lives together in good conscience and out of God-based love, no one has the right to interfere with that decision.

Anyone who tries to interfere has a political and not a God based agenda 99.9% of the time. They destroy but do not edify, build up.

After many years of trying to understand my personal sexual orientation, I came to accept myself as the person that God created. Nothing in God's world happens by mistake.

Who am I? The only label that fits me is: CHILD OF GOD MADE IN HIS IMAGE AND LIKENESS.

At 2:10 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

No ur right but it is to love the Lord your God with all ur heart, all ur soul, and allur strenght.

At 2:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey so I am a big fan of you pauley then I read u are christain and I got so excited because I am to then I read that u support gays that was a bummer because in the bible in leviticus 18:22 it says that homosexuality is a detestable sin. I being a born again christain no that I must love the person hate the sin and being gay and lieing are both horrible sins but God will spit the gays out of his mouth. I do think u are cool girl.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Free Web Counters
Free Site Counter